101 online dating tips

24 Sep

Even if the two of you are really hitting it off, end the date as planned. If you said yes: Plan to pay — but accept your date’s offer to do so. If he mentions a “next time” and you’re eager to see him again, don’t play hard to get or send mixed signals. Smile, touch his shoulder, and reassure him that his efforts are appreciated. If the relationship is heading somewhere, you’ll have plenty of time to talk about fertility worries, family drama or financial pressures.Never expect anyone to pay for you, but understand that there’s a good chance that the person asking you out fully plans to do just that on the first date. If you really want to chip in, cover after-dinner drinks, or offer to pay next time. Assuming your date planned the night — and she didn’t plan something you’re morally opposed to, or physically allergic to — try to embrace her plan. If the other person wants to go out again and you do, too, initiate some contact. Send a quick email to thank him for the great night. (But don’t overdo it.) Don’t dust off the bowtie for a coffee date — unless it’s your signature accessory — but do wear a clean shirt. Yes, some big topics will likely come up — don’t hide the fact you have kids, are divorced, or that your faith is important to you, for example — but don’t share more than you need to when it comes to really personal matters.When it comes to following up after a date, ignore the three-day rule and do what feels right to you. Just be yourself: the right person will appreciate it. What advice would you give someone going on a first date?

There are plenty, like me, who are blissfully lacking in life experience, have yet to reach the big 3-0, and spend more time swiping left on Tinder instead.

Don’t criticize the menu or complain that she didn’t give you a heads up about the dress code. If the two of you aren’t a good fit, you don’t have to go out on a second date. Reference a conversation you had to let him know you’re thinking about the date fondly. Make a good impression — and show your date some respect — by arriving when you said you would. Make an effort to present the best version of yourself and to dress appropriately for the specific date. Manners are important, regardless of how well the two of you hit it off. It can be overwhelming to the listener, and can put the sharer in a vulnerable spot. It’s easy to spend most of a first date worried about what impression you’re making or what anecdote you should share next — and totally forget to pay attention to what the other person is saying.

Give your date your full attention, and ask questions directly related to the things she’s sharing with you.

Choose a place that’s public, relatively local, and conducive to conversation. Whether it’s coffee, drinks or dinner, you initiated it, so you should expect to pay for it. This is why it’s important to pick a date spot that’s not too far away. This gives you both the freedom to leave at any time — not that you’re expecting the date to go horribly, but it’s wise to consider an exit strategy — and won’t make anyone feel like they’re being held hostage.

(This also helps you avoid that awkward in-the-car hug that occurs when you’re dropping someone off.) Make your date feel at ease. Smile, show a real interest in your date, and be yourself.