Parents with children dating

28 Jul

So, how do we avoid appearing on those talk-shows where couples express their frustrations with their partner to ten million viewers?

First, by understanding the dynamics of falling in love.

parents with children dating-59parents with children dating-67parents with children dating-67

Many choose to look around, which is fine for the junior and senior high school years.For instance, I realize that I only dated brunettes—despite the advertising campaign at the time that “blondes have more fun.” My mother and grandmother had dark hair! We begin to make a mental list of the qualities we most value in those closest and dearest to us. Money believers that, by the time we are eight years old, we have an unconscious but very precise idea of what our future dates and mate should look like. (I’ve even gotten to the point of hugging my parents.) In other areas, though, we haven’t coped that well.Many believe that our dating radar is programmed to detect those who match up to these unconscious emotional images. (We’re both terminally stubborn.) But understanding the tendency to marry someone to solve childhood issues has been helpful in seeing why we expect certain things from adult relationships.Of course the hapless humans have no idea that they are now controlled from the mother ship. Harville Hendrix, believes our “old brain” which records emotional responses, creates an exact resume’ of our future spouse. For instance, both Lois and I came from homes which were not very demonstrative about voicing emotions—good or bad.We marry the emotional image of our care-givers—both positive and negative. John Money agrees that each of us begins to form ideas of the “perfect” partner the moment we are born. So, we have worked hard at saying “I love you” to each other and to our kids.